At 19 I had a shared exhibition of paintings and drawings in a small London gallery with a friend. I had painted and drawn most days since the age of about 10 and expected life to be full of art and 'knew', (with the arrogance of youth!), that I would do well as an artist. Then at 20 the baby thing happened and time became all-consumed by necessities like money and washing (washing . . . a major part of the last 20 years). As the family grew to number six, so did the washing pile and the cash demands.
Art simmered on the back-burner, never leaving my life but never being a main income nor what I had expected.
Through the years I have worked on art projects, been closely involved with Foundation for Women's Art and I run a successful graphic design business, producing commission illustrations when asked. Creativity had always been there in some form but not directly in terms of picking up a tool and creating what is in my mind, working to commission as a graphic designer is a very very different thing.
Two years ago I started regularly drawing again and set up a website where I could show potential clients my work. I produced various drawings but nothing constant and still felt that the youthful confidence would not return. In that same year I got as far as filling out the forms for a course, this being the same year my eldest was taking AS levels, the forms stayed in the drawer. The next year I did the same trick - that time the forms even got to 'in the envelope' stage but not crucially 'in the post' . . .
This March with my daughter's University applications made and change in the air I made a decision that I would do an Art course and commit to it. By August I had an interview date set for a degree course called 'Art for Employment' - a path to work, for artists who realise they need to eat as well as create! All was looking good.
At the interview, everything went well. After saying that I was ideal for the course and that I could have a place, the tutor told me that there had only been a few applications and the course would not run until 2008. Disaster, I had psyched myself up so much, what a let-down.
All was not lost, the tutor suggested I apply for an alternative course for this year and hone my skills, get into painting and drawing for a year and try some new media. As I walked away from the interview I felt dejected and sad but then with a sharp bootstrap jerk I realised I had been offered a great opportunity.
In the name of discipline and with much direction, I'm now three weeks into the Fine Art painting and drawing course. 16 mature students, some outstanding work going on and I have not had so much time to draw, paint and read for years. Feels a bit naughty but with development firmly in my brain I am so excited.
Full circle in 20 years I suppose that's not bad!
From my sketchbook: Bright Heart
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